Norbert

Even though he's on his last legs with renal failure, Norbert still has the swagger that caused us to pick him from amongst his (many) mewing siblings back in 1990, at the Palo Alto animal shelter.

Gloria said:

"Why not that one? He seems a bit livelier than the others. Look! He's trying to bite my finger! How cute!"

"Cute"—right. One time I tried to capture him and bring him in from the backyard, despite his obvious wishes that this not take place. He bit me in the finger so hard I almost passed out. Later, my hand swelled up like a balloon from some sort of feline-specific infection, and I was prescribed an apocalyptic antibiotic that killed the bacilli but also triggered a visit by the municipal Animal Control Police.

"If he bites someone else, we may have to take him in,"

the animal guy said. Since then, we keep him mostly inside. Like federal detainees, he's confined to one secured location while receiving periodic exercise, medical supervision, and his meals in a controlled environment.